The Only Flaw Is Thinking That You’re Flawed

It was one of those oversized envelopes stuffed in the mail box. It looked pretty important, unlike most of the things I find stuffed in my mail box.

The manufacturer of my car was notifying me of a recall, something to do with some part of the fuel pump which needed to be replaced. When I called to schedule the service appointment, I was assured this was no big deal. Anthony explained there was some sort of design flaw impacting the original fuel pumps but the new ones are ready to install.

Flaws. In automobiles they’ve figured out how to correct them when the performance of the vehicle isn’t meeting certain standards. In humans, though, flaws are a bit of a different story.

It’s all about the story.

The story we tell ourselves about ourselves.

At some point in our lives we start to accept certain things about ourselves. And we’re quite good of identifying and accepting the not so good stuff we tell ourselves about ourselves. Flaws, we call them.

There is a certain peace in accepting your flaws. You’re no longer fighting against yourself. Your acceptance of these limitations and shortcomings act as some sort of loving and Continue reading “The Only Flaw Is Thinking That You’re Flawed” →

When You Run Your Own Race The Trophy Is Your Life

Seeing that number brought back the pain of that day.

I had three hours to finish and I wasn’t quite sure if I would. I came out of the final turn of my first half marathon and with one eye on the finish line and the other on the clock I knew it was going to be close.

It was.

I made it.

And it hurt.

Going through a box of papers this week I found the race bib I had worn on that day. Number 156. It was a race I wish I had trained a bit differently for, but at age 59 I had officially completed the 13.1 mile distance the half marathon demanded of me. Dehydrated, sore, and legs like Jell-O, crossing that finish line was a joyful kind of pain I proudly earned every ounce of.

Coming in almost dead last in a field of 1,500 runners doesn’t sound very glorious but it was one of the greatest moments of my life. By the time I got to the finish line there were no balloons or Continue reading “When You Run Your Own Race The Trophy Is Your Life” →

Are You Worth The Effort?

Perhaps this is a question you’ve never asked of yourself.

Our ability to grow and evolve is a choice we get to make for ourselves. Odds are there are already blueprints for the steps we’ll need to take to grow and evolve into whatever it is we decide we want to grow and evolve into. With an endless amount of information surrounding us, what is needed is a willingness to actually take action.

That’s where we can get stuck.

I’ve enthusiastically stood on the threshold of growth many times, both personally and professionally. I’ve had the opportunity, the ability, and I knew what needed to be done. Yet, quite often, I never did.

Looking back on several of those moments in my life, I’ve found a common theme for my inaction. It wasn’t laziness. It wasn’t ignorance.

It was a matter of worthiness.

There’s a story we always tell ourselves about ourselves. It’s a story of who it is we believe ourselves to be and what we believe is possible for us in our lives. For me, the greatest killer of Continue reading “Are You Worth The Effort?” →

Our Own Sacred Space To Unfold

Growth should come with a warning label. Not to dissuade anyone from starting, but just to let them know what lies ahead.

For some, growth is a luxury, a curiosity-based exploration into the further reaches of human potential. For others, growth is a necessity, driven by the consistent and crushing emotional weight of unresolved trauma and pain, to the point where a journey through the fire becomes the only viable option.

Mine was more of a necessity.

A commitment to growth signs you up for a process of learning and unlearning, of discovering and uncovering, of defining and re-defining, of anxiously diving into the deep end of your emotional pool while questioning your ability to swim.

And knowing nobody is coming to save you once you hit the water.

The journey through my own fires has been a challenging and meandering undertaking, at times Continue reading “Our Own Sacred Space To Unfold” →

Life, Unleashed

There are two dogs living in my head.

There’s the old one. The one who has quite the collection of scars and bruises which one can only get by living. The emotional beatings have forged a mindset some would choose to call wisdom, if they had the wisdom to do so. Such life lessons, though, often leave a myopic view of what is truly possible moving forward.

And then there’s the puppy, alive with curiosity and endless energy, obliviously moving forward, not yet jaded by life’s often cruel way of teaching the things it feels the need to teach. The puppy’s childlike mindset is one of fearless possibilities, of discovery and expansion.

These are the two dogs living in my head.

At various times in my life I’ve been both of these animals. At times silently jaded and hopelessly resigned to what is. At times highly energized and fully alive, ready to chase any stick the Continue reading “Life, Unleashed” →

Changing Everything Ends Up Changing Nothing

I just couldn’t wait for the ball to drop. Because in that moment I would be reborn anew, ready to live the best year I would ever live.

New Year’s Day. It’s January 1st and I’ve been gifted 365 pristine days to evolve into the highest, most elevated version of myself. A new year. A new me.

And this time I mean it.

The vision of what I’ll grow into just one year from now is rather exciting. Those personal and professional goals all accomplished just as they were planned. New habits, new belief systems, new energy collectively elevating me into this unstoppable force, an epic transformation and a life redefined.

Sometimes, though, trying to change everything ends up changing nothing.

And nothing usually did.

Failure and frustration have taught me that heading into a new year one of the first things I need Continue reading “Changing Everything Ends Up Changing Nothing” →

When You Focus Upon The Light

The broken pots told the story of why the red leaves and dirt littered the floor in front of me. The local garden center had a large display of Christmas poinsettias and a couple of these vibrant plants apparently had fallen off the table, their plastic pots breaking open as they hit the concrete floor below.

Seeing the plants out of their pots showed a cross section their life story. The dirt, the roots, the stems, and the leaves. The leaves always get the glory, but it all started in the dirt.

Before a flower is celebrated for it’s beauty, the seed begins the journey buried in darkness, covered, watered, and left on its own to find its way instinctively upward and towards an unseen light. From a human perspective, such a journey would be daunting and quite traumatic. But to a flower, it’s simply the process of growing.

As humans, dirt is often a part of our growth process. Dirt, in the form of disappointments, pain, Continue reading “When You Focus Upon The Light” →

Recoloring Your World Of Possibilities

“Four gallons of Morning Fog, please.”

Semi-gloss.

After months of searching for the perfect color to repaint the family room, we finally settled on Morning Fog, a gray-ish blue or a blue-ish gray tone for a space which has been the same color for close to a decade and a half. After a full weekend with a brush and a roller, the transformation of the room is now complete.

It looks weird.

I do like it. But after seeing the room one way for some 15 years, any change in color would probably be weird.

Change can feel weird. Even anxious. We’ve seen something the same way for a long period of time and any deviation from that vision takes some getting used to.

If we are willing to change in the first place.

Many of the most significant personal changes I’ve made in my life first ran into a wall of apprehension. The vision of who I wanted to become deviated greatly from the vision I’ve long had of myself, and that inconsistency was met with fierce inner resistance. Our vision colors our world, defining who we think we are and what we are willing to accept as possible for our lives. A new vision, of seeing myself differently than I’ve habitually seen myself, was needed in order for Continue reading “Recoloring Your World Of Possibilities” →

The Benefits Of Showing Up Anyway

I didn’t expect the results to be good.

And they weren’t.

Standing in a cold wind-driven rain, I, along with several hundred others runners were lined up awaiting the starting gun to fire. The five mile course would meander through the Seaport district and along the frigid waterfront of South Boston. While I was ready for the start I knew I wasn’t ready to run.

But that’s what I was there to do.

The reasons for me not being as ready as I had wanted to be were strictly my own. “Other priorities” would be a convenient reframing of the excuses associated with my lack of being fully Continue reading “The Benefits Of Showing Up Anyway” →

Enthusiasm Is Always An Option

“Anesthesiologist.”

That was Avery’s response when I asked her what she intended to work towards as she’s now a week away from heading off to college. Avery is very intelligent, and when combined with her drive and work ethic she leaves you will the impression that she’ll become anything she wants to become.

On the cusp of an exciting new chapter of her life, her level of excitement and enthusiasm are infectious. She’s worked hard to get to this point and she’s ready to dive in to what’s next.

I have to admit, when I was young and heading off to college my level of enthusiasm was never at the same level as Avery’s. The only thing that was infectious was my indifference and sense of stagnation. Maybe it was my lack of direction or vision for my life, or maybe it was me not being ready or even willing to fully embrace the next chapter of my life.

My relationship with enthusiasm had always put the pressure on other people, external events, and desired outcomes to give me something to be excited about. There was no inner organic sense of enthusiasm to be found, especially as I assumed the responsibilities of being an adult.

In reality, there was plenty to be excited and enthusiastic about. If I simply decided to see life in that way.

One of the most important milestones in my emotional and spiritual evolution was when I began to assume full responsibility for my life experience. When I decided to hold myself accountable Continue reading “Enthusiasm Is Always An Option” →

Peter Mis LivingHalfFull.com

Lessons From A Life Unfolding

Tag: growth