The Water Isn’t As Deep As You Think It Is

The cinematography was quite convincing.

We are transported back in time, April 1912 to be exact, 325 nautical miles south-southeast off the coast of Newfoundland. It is here in the frigid waters of the North Atlantic we find the wreckage of the Titanic, and in this iconic scene we see Rose floating upon a wooden door with Jack holding on tightly, his body almost fully submerged in the bitterly cold ocean, an ocean which would soon claim Jack’s life and the lives of hundreds more.

Then the director yelled “Cut!”.

The scene was over, Jack stood up, Rose got off the door, and together they walked to the edge of the tank, stepped out, and toweled off.

Apparently the water wasn’t as deep as we thought it was.

The power of cinematography.

On our own level, we are all talented cinematographers in our own right. We can be quite good at convincingly transporting ourselves into our own dramatic scenes, the painful and fearful emotional waters where we, too, may believe our only option is to cling ever so tightly to some Continue reading “The Water Isn’t As Deep As You Think It Is” →

The Perfect Place To Be Annoyed

There are days when even I don’t like being around me.

Today is one of those days.

It’s been a busy stretch of late. Personal and professional obligations have outpaced my capacity to properly fuel my ability to take care of them. Quality sleep and quality nutrition have been the collateral damage in my attempt to balance all that needs to be balanced.

I’m annoyed, easily agitated, a bit overwhelmed, and I don’t see any upcoming breaks in the schedule where I’ll be able to catch my breath.

I’m not good at being miserable.

But here I am, trying not to splatter my misery upon those around me.

For me, one of the best parts about being miserable is being able to step back and notice that I Continue reading “The Perfect Place To Be Annoyed” →

The Willingness To Ask

Spending $72.00 on M&M’s was much easier than I thought it would be.

I’m in New York City with the family, Times Square. And in Times Square is a huge retail store dedicated to just one thing.

M&M’s.

On three floor with over 25,000 square feet of space, for me the highlight of visiting is always the Wall Of Chocolate, a 50 foot wide 2-stories tall collection of 74 tubes filled with every M&M imaginable. Grab a plastic bag, place it under the tube, open the chute, and the color of your choice drops into your bag. Then off to the next color. And then the next color.

The fun adds up.

And at $17.00 per pound, so does the cost.

Standing in the checkout line I had no idea how much I had spent, but from the weight of the bag I knew it would be steep. It was a fun experience, the kids were quite happy, and it’s hard to assign a dollar value to that.

The cashier was quite engaging, and we had a nice conversation while she weighed and scanned each of the bags we’d filled. “$71.85 is your total.” As I handed my card over for payment, I jokingly suggested I should have asked for a “friends and family” discount based upon the jovial nature of our conversation. Apparently she thought that was a good idea, and to my surprise, I was given 30% off my total.

I really wasn’t expecting a discount. But in asking, even jokingly, I did receive one.

If you don’t ask the answer is always no.

Asking can be rather uncomfortable at times. Especially when we are asking ourselves some uncomfortable questions. About our life. About what we want for our life. About where we are in life in relation to what we want in our life.

Often it’s just easier to take what’s in front of us and to take what life has given us and be on our way. Avoiding any introspective questions means we don’t need to deal with their potential discomfort. In time, though, such avoidance creates its own inevitable discomfort as you eventually acknowledge the gap between where you are and where you want to be.

Much of our willingness to accept less than we want for ourselves is an underlying mindset that we may believe we are somehow unworthy of receiving all that is ours to receive. And if we don’t feel we are worthy of it, we certainly won’t be asking for it. In accepting this premise, we will perpetuate our existing life experience creating additional evidence we will use to support this premise of unworthiness. Continue reading “The Willingness To Ask” →

Sometimes You Need To Be Reminded What You’re Fighting For

It can appear subtle, even innocuous. Yet to the recipient the impact of their words and actions can profoundly influence the direction of a life.

Life can lull us into settling in, where making peace with the less-than-desirable situations is preferred to the isolation of standing your ground and honoring the vision and the intention of the life you’ve told yourself you want to create. There is a level of comfort in surrendering and accepting, until you’re eventually made uncomfortable as you’re reminded of the price you’ve paid for your emotional appeasement.

For those willing to move forward with an intentional life, those intentions are often tested in order to evaluate just how committed you actually are. The Universe knows that talk is indeed very cheap. It’s quite easy to espouse your intentions, but it’s a whole different story if you’re Continue reading “Sometimes You Need To Be Reminded What You’re Fighting For” →

The Only Flaw Is Thinking That You’re Flawed

It was one of those oversized envelopes stuffed in the mail box. It looked pretty important, unlike most of the things I find stuffed in my mail box.

The manufacturer of my car was notifying me of a recall, something to do with some part of the fuel pump which needed to be replaced. When I called to schedule the service appointment, I was assured this was no big deal. Anthony explained there was some sort of design flaw impacting the original fuel pumps but the new ones are ready to install.

Flaws. In automobiles they’ve figured out how to correct them when the performance of the vehicle isn’t meeting certain standards. In humans, though, flaws are a bit of a different story.

It’s all about the story.

The story we tell ourselves about ourselves.

At some point in our lives we start to accept certain things about ourselves. And we’re quite good of identifying and accepting the not so good stuff we tell ourselves about ourselves. Flaws, we call them.

There is a certain peace in accepting your flaws. You’re no longer fighting against yourself. Your acceptance of these limitations and shortcomings act as some sort of loving and Continue reading “The Only Flaw Is Thinking That You’re Flawed” →

When You Run Your Own Race The Trophy Is Your Life

Seeing that number brought back the pain of that day.

I had three hours to finish and I wasn’t quite sure if I would. I came out of the final turn of my first half marathon and with one eye on the finish line and the other on the clock I knew it was going to be close.

It was.

I made it.

And it hurt.

Going through a box of papers this week I found the race bib I had worn on that day. Number 156. It was a race I wish I had trained a bit differently for, but at age 59 I had officially completed the 13.1 mile distance the half marathon demanded of me. Dehydrated, sore, and legs like Jell-O, crossing that finish line was a joyful kind of pain I proudly earned every ounce of.

Coming in almost dead last in a field of 1,500 runners doesn’t sound very glorious but it was one of the greatest moments of my life. By the time I got to the finish line there were no balloons or Continue reading “When You Run Your Own Race The Trophy Is Your Life” →

On The Days You Really Don’t Want To

I was looking forward to it all day.

Nothing.

As in doing nothing when I finally got back home.

Life can get rather busy, can’t it? Commitments, obligations, and responsibilities can collectively get quite heavy at times. But on this night, there was nothing to carry.

The start of the year marked a re-commitment to taking care of my physical self. A recent series of ailments and injuries sidetracked my exercise efforts for the better part of a year, and now I was determined to get back on track.

I mapped out a schedule, I knew what I was going to do, and I started doing it.

But this night was a welcomed night off.

Until I remembered it wasn’t.

While relaxing and decompressing, excited that I’d be able to get to bed a bit earlier than usual, Continue reading “On The Days You Really Don’t Want To” →

It All Starts With Frequency

I still have no idea what the song is about.

It’s 1994. The band REM releases it’s new album and the first single is “What’s The Frequency, Kenneth?”. The song title refers to the 1986 assault on CBS News anchor Dan Rather, with one of the assailants repeatedly asking “Kenneth, what is the frequency?” during the attack.

It’s a catchy little tune, with a very interesting backstory, with lyrics which to this day confound me with their meaning.

Despite my decades-long confusion about this song, I find myself at times asking myself the same question posed in this song’s title.

What’s the frequency, Pete?

I think a great deal about frequency. The frequency I am putting out into the world in terms of my energy and the corresponding vibrations which come along with it. Because I know that Continue reading “It All Starts With Frequency” →

Everything That Needs To Be Said

Maybe we don’t have to fix the problem.

Resolve the issue.

Map out the next three steps.

In their moment of hurt perhaps all they want from us is our presence, to silently sit in their mud with them, to give them a safe space just to be, to remind them in the loneliest of moments that they aren’t really alone at all.

At a time where there are often no words, we need not bother looking for them.

Sometimes our presence says everything that needs to be said.

Photo by Transly Translation Agency on Unsplash

The Ever Present Presence Of Pain

The constant annoying chirp coming from the ceiling was doing me a huge favor. The batteries in the smoke detector were kind enough to tell me they needed to be changed.

My annoyance eventually shifted to gratitude as I climbed the ladder and replaced the two AA batteries. Grateful to be made aware of a situation and to proactively take care of it.

But not everything that is broken tells us that it is.

Especially when it comes to people.

We humans are quite good at masking pain, aren’t we? Of hiding the hurt behind radiant smiles and jovial laughter, creating an outer perception of “all togetherness” while being anything but on the inside.

The expression of pain and hurt is viewed as a weakness, an emotional liability in a world which seemingly only values strength. So facades are built, walls are constructed, and the painful Continue reading “The Ever Present Presence Of Pain” →

Peter Mis LivingHalfFull.com

Lessons From A Life Unfolding