Dear Intuition, I’m Sorry

Something told me it was wrong, but I just kept going anyway.

It was a perfect day for a ride through the woods. Crisp but not cold, and the morning sun was filtering through the colorful leaves of the season. It was the annual 10 mile charity trail race taking me and my mountain bike through gravel fire roads and off-road grass and root-covered trails within the confines of a local conservation reserve.

Half way through the course and things were looking good. I was making good time and my legs felt strong. Ahead of me was another rider who had passed me a bit earlier. With the course poorly marked it felt good to have someone in the distance ahead of me to guide me through the remainder of the ride.

Or so I thought.

As we both headed down the only paved section of the course I noticed the open gate of a fire road which looked somewhat familiar. I participated in this event a year ago and I remember the Continue reading “Dear Intuition, I’m Sorry” →

Reapplying The Vision Of Your Life

It was time to do something special.

For my car.

Gassing up, I caught a glimpse out of the corner of my eye. A car wash. The car was on the filthy side and for some reason on this random day I decided to spend a couple of bucks and clean it up a bit.

I stopped at the kiosk as I approached the entrance. There I was presented with six different car wash options ranging from the basic wash to “The Works”. I don’t recall the exact name of the option I selected, but once my credit card payment was accepted the light turned green and into the wash bay I went.

All through the washing process a large LED indicator would light up and tell me exactly where we were in the cycle. Pre-Rinse, Foam Soak, Undercarriage Wash. Even Rain-X.

I wish they made Rain-X for humans.

The repellent nature of Rain-X causes water to bead up and easily run off coated surfaces, especially windshields. And sure enough with the final rinse of the washing process the water had nothing to cling to now that the car had just been coated.

As a human, sometimes things cling to me. Things get stuck, often becoming emotional things, Continue reading “Reapplying The Vision Of Your Life” →

Sometimes You Need To Be Reminded What You’re Fighting For

It can appear subtle, even innocuous. Yet to the recipient the impact of their words and actions can profoundly influence the direction of a life.

Life can lull us into settling in, where making peace with the less-than-desirable situations is preferred to the isolation of standing your ground and honoring the vision and the intention of the life you’ve told yourself you want to create. There is a level of comfort in surrendering and accepting, until you’re eventually made uncomfortable as you’re reminded of the price you’ve paid for your emotional appeasement.

For those willing to move forward with an intentional life, those intentions are often tested in order to evaluate just how committed you actually are. The Universe knows that talk is indeed very cheap. It’s quite easy to espouse your intentions, but it’s a whole different story if you’re Continue reading “Sometimes You Need To Be Reminded What You’re Fighting For” →

Recoloring Your World Of Possibilities

“Four gallons of Morning Fog, please.”

Semi-gloss.

After months of searching for the perfect color to repaint the family room, we finally settled on Morning Fog, a gray-ish blue or a blue-ish gray tone for a space which has been the same color for close to a decade and a half. After a full weekend with a brush and a roller, the transformation of the room is now complete.

It looks weird.

I do like it. But after seeing the room one way for some 15 years, any change in color would probably be weird.

Change can feel weird. Even anxious. We’ve seen something the same way for a long period of time and any deviation from that vision takes some getting used to.

If we are willing to change in the first place.

Many of the most significant personal changes I’ve made in my life first ran into a wall of apprehension. The vision of who I wanted to become deviated greatly from the vision I’ve long had of myself, and that inconsistency was met with fierce inner resistance. Our vision colors our world, defining who we think we are and what we are willing to accept as possible for our lives. A new vision, of seeing myself differently than I’ve habitually seen myself, was needed in order for Continue reading “Recoloring Your World Of Possibilities” →

Maybe Your Non-Negotiables Actually Are?

“Watch out for the bridge…if you hit it wrong you’ll go flying over the handlebars.”

I came to trust Tom very quickly. We were riding side by side on a rather poorly marked trail through the woods and gravel fire roads of a local nature preserve, a 10 mile mountain bike trek to benefit a local charity. The bridge could have been a disaster, but I crossed over with ease.

Tom knew these woods. “I’ve been riding these trails for years”, Tom said, as often as three times a week. As this was my first time riding through the wilderness, I felt rather fortunate to find a guide to help me navigate my way to the finish line.

At a less intense moment on the course Tom mentioned recently celebrating his 76th birthday. I was silently stunned by his revelation. Seventy f’n six? His relentless energy and stamina were Continue reading “Maybe Your Non-Negotiables Actually Are?” →

The Epic Struggle Between Two Conflicting Versions Of Me

It was one of those tough conversations you knew you had to have.

They’re always tougher when you have to have them with yourself.

December is an important month for me. It’s a time of reflection and introspection. Of looking forward and backward at the same time. My best years are the intentional ones and to prepare myself to make the most of the next 12 months I commit a significant amount of time during the last month of the year setting my course forward.

Going through some notes from a year ago, I found a list of well-intended intentions set for this year which I never actually followed through on. Intentions are promises I make to myself, and this list represented a list of promises I failed to keep. Me letting me down.

My intention setting process involves a vetting sequence. Intentions start as wishes and grand ideas, and while they feel exciting in the moment, I’ve got quite good at challenging myself as to whether I would be willing to actually commit myself to them. Are these wishes and grand ideas something I can honestly see myself getting behind 100%? Or are they simply wishes and grand ideas which would be nice to have but I know I’d never do what it takes to make them happen?

After discovering my list, it looks like I need to refine my vetting process a bit more.

As I looked at my list of unrealized intentions I initially felt a habitual degree of anger towards myself. “I let myself down yet again, didn’t I?” “I thought I had grown past doing this to myself.” I quickly pivoted to Continue reading “The Epic Struggle Between Two Conflicting Versions Of Me” →

Life’s Energy Will Meet You Exactly Where You Are

I don’t know why but of late my social media feeds have felt like one never-ending commercial for psychics and manifestation coaches.

It’s not too often I read my horoscope, so I’m not sure why the algorithms thinks it’s something I have a real interest in. While I have a basic working understanding of the zodiac, it’s never been something I’ve felt compelled to more deeply explore.

Horoscopes can be fun to glance at once in a while, but for me they’ve always felt rather passive. Like, I don’t have to actually do anything. Fate is working out all the details and my destiny will be delivered directly to me.

One thing I’ve learned about life is destiny doesn’t do delivery. That is, if we’re home sitting on the couch waiting for our realized dreams to simply show up we’ll be sitting on the couch for a very long time. The life we want to experience requires us to actually go and create it. The Law fo Attraction requires us to actually take action, aligned and intentional action. The spiritual forces of the Universe will help us to Continue reading “Life’s Energy Will Meet You Exactly Where You Are” →

Life Lessons From A Convenience Store Breakfast Sandwich

I could tell she wanted me by the way she silently spoke to me. Or, maybe it was I doing the wanting? Her presence alone would often draw me in, the heat from the warming table intensifying as I extended my hand closer and closer.

Breakfast. Convenience store breakfast. The She? A bacon, egg, and cheese breakfast croissant, 420 calories full of everything I’ve repeatedly told myself I no longer was going to eat. She, unfortunately, knows me by name. The sandwiches are strategically placed so that my walk from the beverage station to the register takes me right by them every morning. It’s a highly effective merchandising strategy.

What I end up carrying to the register tells me a great deal about myself in that moment.

When I’m feeling drained, frustrated, or annoyed, I’m much more likely to leave the store with a sandwich in hand. Those moments when I’m off purpose, when I’ve sorta lost my way, are the moments when I’ll revert to older habits which feel comfortably familiar, even if I know logically that they aren’t aligned with who it is I tell myself I desire to be. I know better, yet I do it anyway.

Conversely, in those moments when I’m on purpose, aligned with the vision of who it is I wish to grow into, the comfortably familiar old habits become anything but comfortable.

Sorry, breakfast sandwich.

Not today.

I’ve not ever been good at will power. The me trying to be stronger than me battle has never proven to Continue reading “Life Lessons From A Convenience Store Breakfast Sandwich” →

Constructing A Life Of Possibility and Abundance

What we choose to believe with shape us in any moment.

A major highway reconstruction project was recently shut down not too far from my home. The rumor is the project’s general contractor has filed for bankruptcy and this once thriving work area has become a dust bowl of a ghost town. With six years left on a seven year construction schedule everyone is in the dark as to what will happen next.

The main focal point of the work zone to this point is the half mile long concrete retaining wall being built to support the new expanded road surface. Only half of the wall has been poured. The other half is just exposed reinforcement bars which will remain exposed until the state decides what is next for this project.

Reinforcement bar, know as rebar in the trades, is vitally important in any concrete application. While concrete is solid, it has no tensile strength and lacks structural rigidity. Rebar provides that strength and stability, a skeletal framework of steel bars which are hidden on the inside of any concrete structure.

Seeing all this exposed rebar has gotten me to think about my own emotional strength and structural rigidity, my own internal skeletal framework of habits and beliefs which reinforce me.

My emotional rebar.

Poured reinforced concrete is engineered to withstand the predictable forces which it will be exposed to. It’s strength is calibrated and set. Unlike concrete, I find my strength requires more of an ongoing process of recalibration, of intentional reinforcement to better withstand both the predictable and unpredictable forces I as a human am exposed to.

The greatest source of personal recalibration is mindset. My strength is inevitably determined by how I Continue reading “Constructing A Life Of Possibility and Abundance” →

Self Image And The Validity Of Limitations

It was anything but a graceful fall from grace. On some level I knew it was supposed to happen. So, on a different level I made it happen.

I was playing well above my head and my head knew it. I had climbed a bit too high on the corporate ladder, higher than I felt I should have. So I did what I needed to do to keep me aligned with the vision I had created for myself by my self.

We often blame self sabotage as the reason we crash and burn, how we at times seemingly act in ways which undermine what we feel are our best efforts to grow and change. Career, diet, and relationships are all prime ares where despite our best efforts we end up working against ourselves.

In order to keep ourself our self.

Do we really see ourself as being that successful? Of being in that great physical shape? Of being in a healthy relationship?

No, it’s not really sabotage. All we are doing is self regulating, returning to who it is we believe ourselves to be. Realigning with that all-powerful inner vision which controls and regulates what we subconsciously feel is possible for us. We get what we expect Continue reading “Self Image And The Validity Of Limitations” →

Peter Mis LivingHalfFull.com

Lessons From A Life Unfolding

Category: vision