It Always Falls Back On Me, Doesn’t It?

Maybe I didn’t think I was qualified for the job.

And when you don’t think you can do the job, the logical thing to do is to find someone else who you think can.

But some things you can’t outsource.

Like your peace, your happiness, your emotional well being.

When you accept the reality that you are, in fact, the only one qualified for the job of finding your own peace, happiness, and emotional well being, the sooner you’ll stop expecting others to find them or be them for you.

Ready?

Photo by Tj Holowaychuk on Unsplash

The Life Defining Decision

“Perhaps it’s an age thing?”

That was the unexpected response I received when I attempted to explain what could best be described as a life reset process I’ve found myself experiencing. Turning 60 a few years ago I’ve found myself re-evaluating my life priorities. What really matters? Who really matters? How I spend my time and who I spend my time with. Yes, maybe it was an “age thing”, but it served as a catalyst for me deciding to become far more aware and intentional about my life.

Sometimes the demands of family and work responsibilities don’t allow much time to live a more priority-driven life. But that big birthday felt like a wake up call of sorts, with life nudging me to re-evaluate just about every aspect of my life. Not because I had a bad life, but because I wanted to make sure the life I was living moving forward was aligned with the life I truly wanted to live.

As we age we strive to take better care of ourselves physically to ensure our mobility and flexibility. We exercise and we feed our bodies what it needs to be healthy. But how often do we give ourselves an inner check-up in order to better understand how to take better care of ourselves emotionally?

I’ve collected a great deal emotional baggage over the past six decades. The inevitable peaks and valleys of life have shaped me and influenced my life outlook and expectations. As I now move forward in life, much of my re-evaluation process involves looking more closely at those outlooks and expectations. If my past has the power to influence my future, shouldn’t I decide what from my past I want to take with me into my future?

My attitudes, mindsets, beliefs, and habits have all gotten me to where I am today. But are those Continue reading “The Life Defining Decision” →

Smackin’ The Piñata Of Life

There’s a pony hanging from a hook above my desk. It’s small, colorful, and made out of whatever a piñata is made out of. It’s there to remind me of one of life’s most important lessons.

I remember the many birthday parties, rope thrown over a low-hanging branch holding the piñata in position for the kids lined up to take a few swings at in hopes of cracking the thing wide open and spewing candy all over the ground at the base of the tree.

The life lesson?

The candy doesn’t just fall out by itself.

As grown ups, our candy comes in a different form. It takes the shape of our hopes and dreams and aspirations. The things we want to experience and become. The life we want to live. Those hopes and dreams and aspirations are dangling in front of us. But unless we are willing to line up and take consistent swings at the piñata of life all that we want for ourselves will remain within our sights yet out of our reach.

The piñata above my desk reminds me that the life I want to live needs me to show up, to step up, Continue reading “Smackin’ The Piñata Of Life” →

You Don’t Get Back The Days You’ve Wasted

One by one I dropped them into the raging fire, each book a 90 day period of my life now consumed by the flames.

Once a year I’ll gather up the four quarterly planners I’d used to map out the previous year of my life. These books – part planner, part journal – have become important tools in keeping me aligned with the intentions I set for myself.

Prior to surrendering them to the fire, I’ll go back through each book one final time. Old planners are a great source of introspection where reviewing them tells me quite a bit about who I was for that 90 day segment of my life.

Some quarters were full of vibrant alignment with the goals I had set for myself. Some quarters had a great number of blank pages where no daily intentions were set or recorded.

The blank pages have always taught me the most important lessons.

Each of those blank pages represented an opportunity to create, to grow, to live in alignment with Continue reading “You Don’t Get Back The Days You’ve Wasted” →

When You Know Where You’re Going It’s A Lot Easier To Get There

If only the Universe was always this clear.

The long meandering road by the beach ends with a stop sign. The intersection presents only two options. A left turn or a right one. Glancing up at the sign, I see that the names of the roads converging at this point are unusually descriptive. The road to the left is Purgatory Road. The road to the right is Paradise Avenue.

Purgatory or Paradise.

Which would you choose?

At first I found the sign a bit humorous, but on the drive home I started thing about some of the intersections I’ve come to in my own life. The choices I’ve had to make were not as clearly marked, there was never a sign to tell me where my choices would lead me.

With no real signs to guide me, at times I’d simply remain at the stop signs for as long as I could. When unsure of which decision to make, sometimes making no decision was the comfortable decision. And if I had to make a decision, the safe one was usually the familiar one, even if I knew such a decision wasn’t in my best interest. My greatest moments of growth have been when I Continue reading “When You Know Where You’re Going It’s A Lot Easier To Get There” →

Enthusiasm Is Always An Option

“Anesthesiologist.”

That was Avery’s response when I asked her what she intended to work towards as she’s now a week away from heading off to college. Avery is very intelligent, and when combined with her drive and work ethic she leaves you will the impression that she’ll become anything she wants to become.

On the cusp of an exciting new chapter of her life, her level of excitement and enthusiasm are infectious. She’s worked hard to get to this point and she’s ready to dive in to what’s next.

I have to admit, when I was young and heading off to college my level of enthusiasm was never at the same level as Avery’s. The only thing that was infectious was my indifference and sense of stagnation. Maybe it was my lack of direction or vision for my life, or maybe it was me not being ready or even willing to fully embrace the next chapter of my life.

My relationship with enthusiasm had always put the pressure on other people, external events, and desired outcomes to give me something to be excited about. There was no inner organic sense of enthusiasm to be found, especially as I assumed the responsibilities of being an adult.

In reality, there was plenty to be excited and enthusiastic about. If I simply decided to see life in that way.

One of the most important milestones in my emotional and spiritual evolution was when I began to assume full responsibility for my life experience. When I decided to hold myself accountable Continue reading “Enthusiasm Is Always An Option” →

Are You Waiting To Become You?

Commitment without the commitment.

The best of both worlds?

It’s early December and New Year’s Resolution season is just a few weeks away. For me, early December had always been a great time to reflect upon where I was in life and to set the resolutions for what I wanted to accomplish starting on January 1st.

It really was the best of both worlds. Or so that’s what I would tell myself. I made a commitment without the need to yet actually commit. For the next few weeks I could still be the person I was while feeling good about the future commitment I had made. Like, sure, I’m committed to getting myself in better shape, but until the first of the year I’m just going to keep doing the things which got me out of shape.

Sometimes logic isn’t so logical. But I never let that get in my way.

When I knew where I wanted to go, why was I content on waiting until the first of the year to actually start?

Often we know what we want to accomplish in life. We know who it is we want to grow into. Yet, for some reason many of our aspirations remain left undone, leaving us undone in the process. Change and Continue reading “Are You Waiting To Become You?” →

The Foundation For An Intentional Life

It’s that time of year again. Another birthday just ahead.

Birthdays have become important milestones. I’ve learned to approach them with both reflection and intention, reflecting upon how I showed up in the previous 12 months, setting intentions for how I intend to show up for the next 12 months.

The years have taught me a great deal about life, often the hard way. As I prepare to step into my next year I remind myself of some of the most important things I have learned.

I am responsible for my life experience.

I am responsible for my outcomes.

I am responsible for my energy.

I am responsible for my mindset.

I am responsible for the fullest expression of my highest self.

I am responsible for how I allow others to influence me.

I am responsible for my peace.

I am responsible for me.

Continue reading “The Foundation For An Intentional Life” →

Rediscovering The Reverence For The Greatest Gift Of All

Sometimes I still need to call myself out.

Unlike so many other times I’ve called myself out, which tended to border on abusive, this was more of a conversation between equals. This was me holding me accountable for me.

It felt like another day in a series of another days. Yesterday, today, and tomorrow just one seamless repetitively insignificant blur. No urgency. No passion. Just sorta showing up and going through the motions.

“Is that any way to treat the most important gift you’ve ever been given…your life?”

There is so much to be grateful for, yet with all that I’ve been given I can’t remember the last time I started my day with the reverence the gift of my life honesty deserves. The abundance of blessings has become ordinary, just a given, simply expected, like luxuriously plush bath towels at an exclusive resort you’ve been staying at for way too long.

Yes, I am intentional with my gratitude. Daily. It feels like a box I need to check off on my To Do list. But it never quite reaches the magnitude of that awe-struck kid on Christmas morning standing in front of Continue reading “Rediscovering The Reverence For The Greatest Gift Of All” →

The Healthy Discomfort of Personal Accountability

Waiting.

For the world to change. For the right time. For someone to share the experience with.

Waiting for what is to be something other than it actually was.

I was an experienced waiter. Over the decades I could find a great many reasons why waiting was better than actually doing. My ever-expanding list of things I told myself I wanted to experience was, well, ever expanding. Talking about climbing a mountain was always easier than actually doing so. Especially when you’re quite adept at “justifying” your own personal stagnation.

“Someday” became quite comfortable.

At some point I grew tired of my own BS. I grew tired of my own voice telling me “someday”. I finally challenged myself to Continue reading “The Healthy Discomfort of Personal Accountability” →

Peter Mis LivingHalfFull.com

Lessons From A Life Unfolding

Tag: accountability