Are You Worth The Effort?

Are You Worth The Effort?

Perhaps this is a question you’ve never asked of yourself.

Our ability to grow and evolve is a choice we get to make for ourselves. Odds are there are already blueprints for the steps we’ll need to take to grow and evolve into whatever it is we decide we want to grow and evolve into. With an endless amount of information surrounding us, what is needed is a willingness to actually take action.

That’s where we can get stuck.

I’ve enthusiastically stood on the threshold of growth many times, both personally and professionally. I’ve had the opportunity, the ability, and I knew what needed to be done. Yet, quite often, I never did.

Looking back on several of those moments in my life, I’ve found a common theme for my inaction. It wasn’t laziness. It wasn’t ignorance. 

It was a matter of worthiness.

There’s a story we always tell ourselves about ourselves. It’s a story of who it is we believe ourselves to be and what we believe is possible for us in our lives. For me, the greatest killer of Continue reading “Are You Worth The Effort?” →

Our Own Sacred Space To Unfold

Our Own Sacred Space To Unfold

Growth should come with a warning label. Not to dissuade anyone from starting, but just to let them know what lies ahead.

For some, growth is a luxury, a curiosity-based exploration into the further reaches of human potential. For others, growth is a necessity, driven by the consistent and crushing emotional weight of unresolved trauma and pain, to the point where a journey through the fire becomes the only viable option.

Mine was more of a necessity.

A commitment to growth signs you up for a process of learning and unlearning, of discovering and uncovering, of defining and re-defining, of anxiously diving into the deep end of your emotional pool while questioning your ability to swim. 

And knowing nobody is coming to save you once you hit the water.

The journey through my own fires has been a challenging and meandering undertaking, at times Continue reading “Our Own Sacred Space To Unfold” →

Life, Unleashed

Life, Unleashed

There are two dogs living in my head. 

There’s the old one. The one who has quite the collection of scars and bruises which one can only get by living. The emotional beatings have forged a mindset some would choose to call wisdom, if they had the wisdom to do so. Such life lessons, though, often leave a myopic view of what is truly possible moving forward.

And then there’s the puppy, alive with curiosity and endless energy, obliviously moving forward, not yet jaded by life’s often cruel way of teaching the things it feels the need to teach. The puppy’s childlike mindset is one of fearless possibilities, of discovery and expansion.

These are the two dogs living in my head. 

At various times in my life I’ve been both of these animals. At times silently jaded and hopelessly resigned to what is. At times highly energized and fully alive, ready to chase any stick the Continue reading “Life, Unleashed” →

Changing Everything Ends Up Changing Nothing

Changing Everything Ends Up Changing Nothing

I just couldn’t wait for the ball to drop. Because in that moment I would be reborn anew, ready to live the best year I would ever live.

New Year’s Day. It’s January 1st and I’ve been gifted 365 pristine days to evolve into the highest, most elevated version of myself. A new year. A new me.

And this time I mean it. 

The vision of what I’ll grow into just one year from now is rather exciting. Those personal and professional goals all accomplished just as they were planned. New habits, new belief systems, new energy collectively elevating me into this unstoppable force, an epic transformation and a life redefined. 

Sometimes, though, trying to change everything ends up changing nothing.

And nothing usually did.

Failure and frustration have taught me that heading into a new year one of the first things I need Continue reading “Changing Everything Ends Up Changing Nothing” →

When You Focus Upon The Light

When You Focus Upon The Light

The broken pots told the story of why the red leaves and dirt littered the floor in front of me. The local garden center had a large display of Christmas poinsettias and a couple of these vibrant plants apparently had fallen off the table, their plastic pots breaking open as they hit the concrete floor below.

Seeing the plants out of their pots showed a cross section their life story. The dirt, the roots, the stems, and the leaves. The leaves always get the glory, but it all started in the dirt. 

Before a flower is celebrated for it’s beauty, the seed begins the journey buried in darkness, covered, watered, and left on its own to find its way instinctively upward and towards an unseen light. From a human perspective, such a journey would be daunting and quite traumatic. But to a flower, it’s simply the process of growing.

As humans, dirt is often a part of our growth process. Dirt, in the form of disappointments, pain, Continue reading “When You Focus Upon The Light” →

A Gift We Are All Able To Give

A Gift We Are All Able To Give

“You weren’t home so she left it in the mailbox.”

The message was from a neighbor. His eight year old daughter Kenzie had stopped by but no one answered the door. Kenzie was going door to door dropping off the hand-painted Christmas ornaments she had made to all the houses in our small neighborhood. When we got home, I looked in the mailbox and there it was. A blue snowflake with a white string looped through the top. 

It was beautiful. 

On many levels.

Kenzie and her family had moved into the neighborhood a few years ago. For the most part we’d exchanged pleasantries when we’d encounter each other walking past or driving by each others homes. We’d been neighborly, but not to the point of exchanging holiday gifts.

Apparently Kenzie didn’t let that concern her, never getting caught up in the nature of neighborhood dynamics. She just wanted to create something and share it with each of her neighbors. 

So, she did.

Honestly, her kind gesture felt as if I was living in some idilic Hallmark movie in the perfect Continue reading “A Gift We Are All Able To Give” →

Guided By Your Own Light

Guided By Your Own Light

I’m sure I knew not to shine the flashlight into my eyes. But somehow I ended up doing it anyways.

Black Friday Weekend and I find myself meandering through the aisle of Lowe’s. I wasn’t actually looking for a new flashlight, but a deal is a deal so I stopped to check them out. Apparently the brightness of light is measured in something called lumens, and having no concept of what a lumen looked like I turned the flashlight a bit too high and ended up temporarily blinding myself in the process.

Now I know what a lumen is.

The lumens grew even brighter as I adjusted the flashlight’s beam width from wide to narrow, decreasing the size of the illuminated circle while intensifying its glow.

I’ve found myself doing the same thing in my life, adjusting the width of my focus from wide to narrow, decreasing the size of my own circle while intensifying the glow on what really matters.

I guess at some point if you keep working at it, life finally gets clearer. Purpose meets intention Continue reading “Guided By Your Own Light” →

Further Down The Road Of Self-Forgiveness

Further Down The Road Of Self-Forgiveness

It had been about 20 years since my last visit, but I remembered this stretch of road quite well.

Interstate 89 is that long and winding road which would take me from Concord, New Hampshire northwest to the Vermont state line. My recent ride was personal, but for many years early in my professional life the curves and contours of this 60 miles of highway became well known to me.

As I meandered silently on this early Sunday morning drive, I felt as if I was getting reacquainted with an old friend as my mind wandered back to a different time in my life. A time when I was very much a different version of me. A time when I wasn’t really a very good friend to myself.

Despite my professional success, these years were not a happy period for me. Corporate pressures were compounded greatly by the internal pressures I placed upon myself. While my successes seemingly masked my silent fears and insecurities, those fears and insecurities were very Continue reading “Further Down The Road Of Self-Forgiveness” →

The Permission To Feel

The Permission To Feel

Maybe it’s not the most wonderful time of the year.

Maybe the Holidays suck. Maybe it’s a painful time, a time when we are reminded of what’s now missing in our lives, of what never was in our lives. Maybe it’s a time of isolation and loneliness, of struggle, of waiting, of wanting, and of constantly being reminded of how we are supposed to feel regardless of how we actually do.

Our emotions are our own. They need not be validated by others nor minimized by ourselves. There is nothing to justify, nothing to explain.

And, no, you’re not “too much”.

Perhaps this Holiday season you gift yourself the permission to unapologetically feel whatever it is you Continue reading “The Permission To Feel” →