The Water Isn’t As Deep As You Think It Is

The cinematography was quite convincing.

We are transported back in time, April 1912 to be exact, 325 nautical miles south-southeast off the coast of Newfoundland. It is here in the frigid waters of the North Atlantic we find the wreckage of the Titanic, and in this iconic scene we see Rose floating upon a wooden door with Jack holding on tightly, his body almost fully submerged in the bitterly cold ocean, an ocean which would soon claim Jack’s life and the lives of hundreds more.

Then the director yelled “Cut!”.

The scene was over, Jack stood up, Rose got off the door, and together they walked to the edge of the tank, stepped out, and toweled off.

Apparently the water wasn’t as deep as we thought it was.

The power of cinematography.

On our own level, we are all talented cinematographers in our own right. We can be quite good at convincingly transporting ourselves into our own dramatic scenes, the painful and fearful emotional waters where we, too, may believe our only option is to cling ever so tightly to some Continue reading “The Water Isn’t As Deep As You Think It Is” →

The Benefits Of Showing Up Anyway

I didn’t expect the results to be good.

And they weren’t.

Standing in a cold wind-driven rain, I, along with several hundred others runners were lined up awaiting the starting gun to fire. The five mile course would meander through the Seaport district and along the frigid waterfront of South Boston. While I was ready for the start I knew I wasn’t ready to run.

But that’s what I was there to do.

The reasons for me not being as ready as I had wanted to be were strictly my own. “Other priorities” would be a convenient reframing of the excuses associated with my lack of being fully Continue reading “The Benefits Of Showing Up Anyway” →

What Are You Saying To You About You?

I forgot I even owned one.

Going through a long-forgotten box in the back of my closet, and there it was. A Brother P-Touch label maker. Perhaps you had one as well? Simply type in the title of your label, hit “print” and out comes the custom label, right in the palm of your hand. It was rather addictive. I labeled just about everything. File folders, storage tubs, canisters of flour and sugar, even the wires coming out of the back of my computer.

I remember peeling off the back of the printed labels to reveal the sticky side of the tape. With large fingers, it proved to be a challenge from time to time, but once the labels were affixed to the surface they stuck for good.

Labels do have a way of sticking around.

Especially the ones we stick on our self.

As humans we are quite good at creating labels about who we think we are and what is possible for us. Have you ever listened to how you speak to yourself? How often do we reaffirm our limitations? How often do we reinforce a belief system which inhibits our growth and expansion? How often do we let life’s experiences define who it is we accept ourself to be, of letting our past determine our future? When we habitually tell ourselves we’re not good enough, talented enough, beautiful enough, strong enough…when we believe we’re unlovable, that we’re “too much’, unlucky, unworthy…those labels will keep us stuck exactly where we don’t really want to be.

These self-imposed labels greatly influence our overall sense of identity, and our accepted identity is our self-fulfilling prophecy.

The labels we willingly accept don’t even need to actually be true. We just need to believe they are true and our world will unfold accordingly. The good news is these labels are only permanent if allow them to Continue reading “What Are You Saying To You About You?” →

Creating The Space To Receive

I have to admit it was a bit unnerving.

I’d never seen a message like it before. It was from my email provider telling me that my email account was full. I’d need to delete some emails in order to create space to receive any new emails. The message was all text, it’s lack of any visible corporate identity greatly added to my overall sense of skepticism about the authenticity of the message. But when I realized I could no longer download any new messages I knew something had actually happened. Maybe my account was hacked?

Nope.

I had, in fact, reached the maximum capacity of emails in my inbox.

I’ve never been good at managing my email accounts. I get lots of emails from sources both known and unknown, and it’s always been easier to simply ignore these intrusive emails instead of taking the time to delete them and unsubscribe from distribution lists I never even knew I was a part of. I guess my “ignore them” strategy wasn’t perfect. Over the years, this particular account had accumulated over 92,000 unread messages, which, apparently, leaves no room to download anything new.

After spending quite some time deleting several thousand unread messages, I was able to create enough space for new messages to be received.

Being disconnected from my email was quite uncomfortable. What if there were important messages I needed to receive? My discomfort was directly related to my habitually holding on to what didn’t serve me, which, in this case, created no room to receive.

Once I resolved my email issues, I began to wonder. Are there other areas in my life where holding on was inhibiting my ability to receive?

Perhaps the greatest inhibitor to our ability to receive life’s greatest blessings is embracing a mindset Continue reading “Creating The Space To Receive” →

Do You Own Your Own Potential?

Maybe I shouldn’t swear as much as I do. But if you’ve ever stepped on an acorn while barefoot, a few colorful curse words makes for a logical form of self-expression.

Fall in New England is a magical metaphorical time. It’s a season of letting go, of change, and of preparation. For me it’s also a time of reflection and contemplation as we head into the silence of the coming winter. Regardless of the season, I still need to eat, and as I made my way to my grill I was reminded just how painful stepping on an acorn while barefoot actually is.

As the oaks begin shedding their leaves they also drop their acorns, and with the oak tree’s close proximity to my house the back deck is constantly littered with their presence. Acorns are an oak tree’s way of perpetuating their species. While the ones on my deck will never take root, other acorns the tree has dropped may find the proper nurturing environment to turn an acorn into an oak tree. A fascinating process of Nature ensuring it’s own survival.

Acorns are little packets of potential. The seeds of what they were created to become reside inside each of them. But no matter the potential residing within them, their growth and full expression require cultivation in an environment conducive to growth and full expression. They’ll never become anything just resting on the patio.

Us humans are quite similar to acorns, aren’t we? We, too, are all little packets of potential with the seeds of what we were created to become resting within each of us. We, too, will require a nurturing environment conducive to supporting our own growth and full expression.

Unlike acorns whose growth is contingent primarily upon external conditions, the most important Continue reading “Do You Own Your Own Potential?” →

The Surprising Benefits of Thinking Like A Sunflower

It was the strangest thing.

A sunflower growing in the gutter.

My gutter.

I’m not exactly sure how it got there but there it was. Growing tall, fully in bloom, oblivious to the fact that flowers simply don’t grow in the gutter.

This flower just didn’t know any better. It never questioned why it was in the gutter. It never once questioned if it would ever be able to grow there.

It just grew.

Where it was.

I don’t know much about flowers, but I do know about us humans. And for many of us we simply find ways not to grow.

We think. We analyze. We overthink. We overanalyze. So much thinking and we can actually think ourselves out of growing. We use our ability to rationalize to find ways for us to stay in a state of waiting for a better environment, a better time, a better system of support. Guilty, I’ve been, an experienced “justifier” of staying stuck and waiting for things to be “right” before moving ahead.

Meanwhile, in my gutter grows a beautiful sunflower…

Often our stagnation is simply a reflection of our belief system, of what we honestly feel is – or isn’t – possible for us. And rather than confront any limitations in our internal belief system it’s much easier to focus on external conditions and factors as reasons why we’re still where we tell ourselves we no longer wish to be.

What if we were to think like that flower in my gutter and just grew, grew into all we were created to be? Never questioning our ability, our environment, the timing, nor our inherent worthiness to simply allow ourselves to grow into who we were created to become? Right here. Right now.

If we can think of ways to hold ourselves stagnant, why can’t we change that thinking to support our divine evolution?

Could it be that simple?

Just something to not overthink about.

You’re Stronger Than You Think You Are

We did it.

We got through the year we never could have expected to have happened.

So much loss on so many different levels.

But we made it through. We are still here.

If this past year has taught us anything it’s that we are far more resilient than we probably expected we were. If we were told last January what we’d be facing in the coming year I’d suggest many of us would have questioned our ability to get through it.

But we did.

Resiliency is a painful life lesson only life gets to teach us. When going through the wall isn’t ideal but it’s the only option you have. This past year has been quite a wall.

There are still walls in front of us, some pandemic related and others not. A new year doesn’t simply reset the challenges of life. Perhaps, though, we’d serve ourselves well in reflecting upon exactly what we’ve been through and see that yes, we are far more resilient than we may have given ourselves credit for.

Perhaps a small victory, but a rather important one.

My Mom Has A Message For You

With all the discomfort and uncertainty we’ve suddenly been thrust into, I wanted to share some words from the person who’s words have always been of great comfort to me.

My Mom.

Mom just turned 90 a few weeks ago. In 90 years she’s seen more than her share of challenges and painful obstacles that she’s been able to overcome. She was the second youngest of eight children born smack dab in the middle of the Great Depression. She’s been widowed now longer than she was married. She has experienced the unbearable loss of a son, has witnessed the loss of almost all of her siblings, as well as many close friends. She has survived countless numbers of economic downturns wondering how the bills will get paid and the family will be fed. But no matter the pain life has ever thrown at her, her refrain has always remained the same…

“This, too, shall pass.”

The older I get the more I understand and appreciate her wisdom, faith, and resolve. Underneath it all is a rock solid spiritual belief system with gives her both the resolve to endure and the wisdom to trust that this, too, shall pass, that we will, in fact, get through whatever we may find ourselves stuck in. Her prayers aren’t prayers asking for strength; rather, they are prayers reminding God that while she may not understand why she is being tested, she understands that testing is all part of the process of being human.

If you were able to call my Mom today and share your fears, worries, troubles, and concerns with her, she would at some point embrace you and remind you of perhaps the greatest lesson she has ever learned in her 90 years…

“This, too, shall pass.”

photo credit: Chelsea Shapouri via Unsplash

The Most Important Resolution Of Them All

His fingers were so numb from the bitter cold that he could barely even hold the match to light the fire which would soon keep him warm. Eventually the match ignited and the fire was born.

One thing about fires, though. They need to be fed. They simply don’t last simply because you’ve started one. Kinda like the fires we start in life. Fires of desire. Unless we feed them continuously they eventually go out.

New Year’s Day is perhaps the most prolific day to start fires. Fires of desire, that is. All these resolutions and hopes and dreams we decide to bring to life. Yes, we may start such fires but how often do those fires of what we desire simply burn themselves out? Intentions create the initial spark, but without the real commitment the flames will soon be extinguished, starved of the fuel needed to maintain them. Good intentions alone are never good enough.

I’ve certainly started my fair share of fires. A great many of them have met an early demise. Simply because I never fed them. And I never really fed them because I rationalized I must have never wanted them bad enough. But the more accurate reason why many of the fires never got fed was because somewhere inside I never felt I was supposed to have the things I wanted for myself. Continue reading “The Most Important Resolution Of Them All” →

The Surprising Benefits of Thinking Like Water

I was exhausted. I really wasn’t fully prepared for this 5K trail run. Unlike road running, trails offer potential danger in every stride. The extensive network of exposed tree roots and randomly placed stones, all covered with leaves still wet from the heavy rains from the night before, made a challenging course that much more challenging.

Running, for me, is equal parts physical and mental. Sometimes the body is willing but the mind works to convince it that it’s not. On this particular day my mind, too, was racing. The wet, uneven terrain gave it lots to talk to me about. Lots of inner resistance to work through.

The week prior I had hiked this particular preserve just to get more familiar with the trail. On that hike I unexpectedly came upon a small waterfall, fed from the gentle stream behind it. As I stood on the small wooden bridge the water continued to pass under me and then on down stream, gravity taking the water to wherever it was going to go, it’s flow and path greatly influenced by the obstacles it found on the way.

You can learn a lot from water.

The water and the runner shared something in common. We both met resistance on our paths. But the type of resistance we each faced was dramatically different.

Unlike me, the water wasn’t working against itself.

Water never works against itself. Any resistance water faces is always external, always outside of itself. It’s the stones and branches and boundaries and gravity which determine where the water will go. Water never fearfully looks down stream and worries about where it is going and if it will ever get there. It just goes where it goes, never working against itself.

A stark contrast to my running style, where the mind can greatly influence if I even continue to move forward. Much of my resistance is internal. It’s often me working against me, fearfully looking up a hill and doubting if I’ll be able to run up it without stopping.

How often do we allow our thoughts to work against us? Not just in running up hills but in running our lives? How often does our mind create an inner resistance to our own efforts to keep moving forward, to climb up the hills life can often place before us?

Our greatest resistance is almost always self-inflicted.

When we are not working against ourselves we are better able to work through and around those external obstacles standing between who we are and who we really want to be.

Maybe its time to think like water?

Photo by Taylor Leopold on Unsplash

Peter Mis LivingHalfFull.com

Lessons From A Life Unfolding

Category: attitude